"Wake Up" Rhetoric and How Not to Use It

Here's one I've been hammering out in my head for awhile now. When you are on the internet, you will find a certain type of people who say these things: "wake up people!!" "you're such a sheep" or even "the fluoride is really working with this one, huh?" There is nothing wrong with these people, what they are trying to say has meaning and a valid point, but I don't know about you- I find it is impossible to force someone to wake up. Simply because no one can be forced to do anything. And when confronted with the phrase, "Wake UP!!" they are going to be very put off by you and anything you have to day.

I don't know what it was like for you, but I can tell you what it was like for me. I didn't connect all the dots right away. I was a normal, average gal doing all the things you're supposed to do. The only thing that changed my ways was my "spark". This event, or trigger, will be different for everyone. It was ONLY because of this spark that I began to do things differently. That I began researching independently, that I started trusting my own intuition. No one told me to. No one yelled at me to. And most importantly, I was led to the knowledge by my own drive and curiosity. There, I think, is something we can take from this. And let me be clear: this didn't just come to me all at once. Such a drastic change in thinking and being would be bizarre, I would think. No, this is years in the making. We can't expect someone to just roll out of bed and think differently because you told them to. I have realized that there is no argument to be had, because the opponent simply does not know what you know. They have not seen what you have seen. (In most cases, I know you wouldn't want them to, but this is the core- they didn't experience your experiences first hand. They might not even believe your accounts of what happened.) So instead of urging people to shake the wool from their eyes (how can they, if they don't even know it is there? If they don't know WHY it is there?) I think there are a few things we can encourage here instead. 

A want to learn. This is key. I used to think it was admirable to know exactly who you are and where you stand, and I still do. However, it is never admirable to dismiss new information. If new research comes to light and you dismiss it because you are firmly in one camp and not the other- never, ever will you ever be in the other- this is wrong. I am admittedly in numerous "camps", my beliefs are strong. But as an educated person, it is my job to seek out the facts all the time, every time. If something changes, my stance must change. It is not wise to let stubbornness cloud our judgement. One could call this piece open-mindedness, but I also think it's a big part of not short-changing ourselves. Why stop now? Keep going.

Lifelong learning. As I said above, the drive and the curiosity to learn more come from this part. It isn't going to happen overnight. Some people hang this one up at age 18, or 22, or 25. Enough of that, they say. But I would argue that you aren't done, not in the slightest. You are only about a quarter into your life, and you will be ever evolving until the day you die. Once you embrace that you are a lifelong learner, I think it's easier to be a more fluid thinker. "I'm still learning", you can say. I might not know much about this particular topic, but I can learn it. I don't need someone telling me how to learn it- I was given the tools (maybe, hopefully) to analyze this information and come to my own conclusions about it. And you can do that over and over again for as long as you live! Isn't that amazing?

Know a little bit about a lot of things. Apart from the last two points, which emphasize something that might be a calling or a passion, and perhaps can not be learned, this one is easy enough. Know a little about a lot of things. Why? Increasing the breadth of your knowledge can lead you down many paths, of course. But it also gives you a good grounding on multiple viewpoints. If you tend to think mechanically, brush up on some psychology. If you tend to lean on an allopathic/ medical model, read up a few things about a holistic approach. Here we can start to imagine how people have such drastic, radically different opinions. For me, personally, it is important that I read the opposing views of the stuff I am most passionate about. It is not for the reason you may be thinking ("know thy enemy") it is simply because I am fascinated in how strongly they hold their beliefs. Why do they think this? How did they form that opinion? What did they read that has them so fired up? I must know, I must see the source. It all circles back to knowing a little about a lot of things- without this, it's difficult to see where people come from, what path they took to get here, and knowing and recognizing the path that YOU took and how it differs.

Mindfulness of stereotypes. Maybe not as easy as it sounds. See below.

  I chose to add stereotypes because it is very easy to fall prey to them, especially when arguing with someone. I could also add, "Don't Assume" here. We're all guilty of it, I'm just suggesting a mindful attitude towards it- when you can recognize it, you can keep it in check.

 

Trust of intuition. This may be another one that is learned, and not so easy to teach. I believe my strong trust of intuition comes from me listening to my gut over several occasions, and finding it to be correct. Over time, I noticed the correlation between a gut feeling and it being right. This was only learned with experience and a willingness to trust what I was feeling that first time. But as with everything else I've mentioned, if we can be mindful of it, notice it, listen to it and it led you the right way- do whatever you have to do to remember that. Write it down, blog about it, instagram it, whatever it is,  make conscious mention of it so you are more likely to remember it down the road when you're thinking, hey, my intuition was right like 3 or 4 times now, I'm starting to feel like it might know what it's doing! There is science to back up what we call intuition or going with your gut. What's going on inside? Your mind is processing something you aren't conscious of yet. Below is an example that you can find at Science Daily:

[The researcher] cites the recorded case of a Formula One driver who braked sharply when nearing a hairpin bend without knowing why – and as a result avoided hitting a pile-up of cars on the track ahead, undoubtedly saving his life.

“The driver couldn’t explain why he felt he should stop, but the urge was much stronger than his desire to win the race,” explains Professor Hodgkinson. “The driver underwent forensic analysis by psychologists afterwards, where he was shown a video to mentally relive the event. In hindsight he realised that the crowd, which would have normally been cheering him on, wasn’t looking at him coming up to the bend but was looking the other way in a static, frozen way. That was the cue. He didn’t consciously process this, but he knew something was wrong and stopped in time.”

Be Doubtful. Be Skeptical. And never, ever make decisions based on fear. My final observation sounds cynical, but it's actually not. When you start approaching everything with a healthy dose of skepticism you will find that you don't need to be spoon-fed opinions or answers. Again, who knows if you can "learn" to be a skeptic. You can certainly make an effort, though. Why? It's like this: when we go along our whole life with the same people and learn things from trusted sources, we become conditioned. Not in a bad way, not in an Orwellian way- we just do. We trust who we know, who we love, and what they tell us must undoubtedly be true. What if you took every statement they said and questioned: Who's saying this? Why would they say that? What is the motivation for saying it? You don't have to analyze everything people say, you just have to remember that some people repeat what they hear, some people buy in to different ideologies than you do, and some people unwillingly subscribe to fear. 

"Fear mongering" is defined as "the action of deliberately arousing public fear or alarm about a particular issue." I'm not going to go as far as to villify your news sources (but do join an alternative news source for a healthy balance of information on both sides of all issues, for your well being as much as mine). I have done so well not mentioning any topic in particular and am going to try to get through the next few sentences without bringing them up, and therefore, not using any examples. Hopefully you will understand what I'm saying without illustration. I am keeping this blog post Topic Free so that anyone and everyone can apply themselves to what I'm saying and take pieces back to their "camp". 

What I'm looking for here is a refusal to buy in to fear based articles, news stories, what have you. This is very easy. Here's what to do: read the title of the article. Stop. How does it make you feel? Does it elicit an immediate response? If the answer is yes- this is not just a headline. It was placed there to make you feel that way. Ask yourself the questions. Why? Who? To what purpose? Most importantly, I urge you to NEVER make a decision based on fear. You don't have to say no- just press pause. "I have to read more about it", "I will have to look into it, thanks for the suggestion", "I'm not saying no, just not right now" are all appropriate responses if you are feeling pressure to respond.

Words have power, and using them manipulatively is common place. So when you feel a certain emotion when reading, or when speaking with someone, work with that. When I read something that makes me feel a certain way (on purpose), I immediately search to see if there is any official response. Sometimes called a "rebuttal", these pieces can be found through the grapevine of like-minded people or even a quick Google search. They show up in academic papers and research journals, all the way down to a local Op Ed piece in your local newspaper. I'll again say that I recommend reading one story from both sides- yes, every time. Which leads me to my final point. 

Time- bread and circuses. If you've made it this far, you're probably wondering what the heck, lady. I can't go through life this way- it's too much work, it takes too much time- time that I don't have. And let me say that I agree with you completely. This is not your fault. Bread and circuses, or Panem et circenses, has been around long before you were even thought of. The general idea is to keep people superficially busy so that they do not have the time to go about questioning everything and everyone. Literally, it means to provide the common people with cheap food and cheap entertainment so they don't notice what you are doing (a power grab, corruption, etc). Make no mistake- I do not think working to provide for your family is superficial. It was set up so that you can be busy, so busy, so so so so busy, that time for independent research is limited if existent at all.

I recently read an article that argued that white, affluent, college educated females (a group that's less likely to vaccinate their children) were more able to do independent research simply because they could afford the luxury of TIME to do so. When everything else is stripped away- that is what it came down to. Time. They don't love more, care more, think more, rebel more- they simply were able to take matters into their own hands and devote time to it. That's it.

What CAN you do?  So much of this list talks about things that are difficult to learn, let alone teach. Time is stacked against us and we belong to a system in which it is no way our fault if we can't carve out time to come to our own conclusions, so we turn to TV personalities or newscasters to tell us what to do and what to think (Yes, I know not all of you do this, it's a point I'm making). So pretty hopeless, right? I don't think so. I think there are a few things we can do as individuals. I think we can stop yelling at people to wake up. I hope that I've provided enough evidence that it's not useful and won't change anything- but if you need more, my husband suggests that it sounds condescending and something the whack jobs would say.

I think that we can lead by example. So many of the great thinkers, Osho and Rumi included, mention that you can change the world by changing yourself.

I think that there is a greatness in being heard- my entire being longs to educate and advocate- but perhaps it is sometimes wise to let them come to you. I say enough so that people know where I stand, but I do not harp. If I conduct myself in a quiet, unassuming manner, they will come to me. And they have. With questions. With problems. And every time I am thankful that I did not push them away by going off on tangents about sheeple. Because when they are ready to listen, you must be there for them.

And finally, if this made you mad: Ask yourself why. 

It's EARTH Day!

I wouldn't be a "natural" mama if I didn't get a little bit excited about Earth Day, right?



In my own personal opinon, it's a little bit silly that EARTH gets a DAY. Since we exercise a lot of green practices over here, we are constantly thinking about the planet, resources, and what we can do to preserve these things for future generations. We live a very green life every day. But it wasn't always this way!

Before I tell you my history, let's talk a little bit about the history of Earth Day and how it came to be. You can also check out the full story at http://www.earthday.org/earth-day-history-movement.

"

Earth Day: The History of A Movement

Each year, Earth Day -- April 22 -- marks the anniversary of what many consider the birth of the modern environmental movement in 1970.
The height of hippie and flower-child culture in the United States, 1970 brought the death of Jimi Hendrix, the last Beatles album, and Simon & Garfunkel’s “Bridge Over Troubled Water”. Protest was the order of the day, but saving the planet was not the cause. War raged in Vietnam, and students nationwide increasingly opposed it.
At the time, Americans were slurping leaded gas through massive V8 sedans. Industry belched out smoke and sludge with little fear of legal consequences or bad press. Air pollution was commonly accepted as the smell of prosperity. “Environment” was a word that appeared more often in spelling bees than on the evening news.  Although mainstream America remained oblivious to environmental concerns, the stage had been set for change by the publication of Rachel Carson's New York Times bestseller Silent Spring in 1962.  The book represented a watershed moment for the modern environmental movement, selling more than 500,000 copies in 24 countries and, up until that moment, more than any other person, Ms. Carson raised public awareness and concern for living organisms, the environment and public health.
Earth Day 1970 capitalized on the emerging consciousness, channeling the energy of the anti-war protest movement and putting environmental concerns front and center.

The idea came to Earth Day founder Gaylord Nelson, then a U.S. Senator from Wisconsin, after witnessing the ravages of the 1969 massive oil spill in Santa Barbara, California. Inspired by the student anti-war movement, he realized that if he could infuse that energy with an emerging public consciousness about air and water pollution, it would force environmental protection onto the national political agenda. Senator Nelson announced the idea for a “national teach-in on the environment” to the national media; persuaded Pete McCloskey, a conservation-minded Republican Congressman, to serve as his co-chair; and recruited Denis Hayes as national coordinator. Hayes built a national staff of 85 to promote events across the land.

As a result, on the 22nd of April, 20 million Americans took to the streets, parks, and auditoriums to demonstrate for a healthy, sustainable environment in massive coast-to-coast rallies. Thousands of colleges and universities organized protests against the deterioration of the environment. Groups that had been fighting against oil spills, polluting factories and power plants, raw sewage, toxic dumps, pesticides, freeways, the loss of wilderness, and the extinction of wildlife suddenly realized they shared common values.
Earth Day 1970 achieved a rare political alignment, enlisting support from Republicans and Democrats, rich and poor, city slickers and farmers, tycoons and labor leaders. The first Earth Day led to the creation of the United States Environmental Protection Agency and the passage of the Clean Air, Clean Water, and Endangered Species Acts. "It was a gamble," Gaylord recalled, "but it worked.""

Nowadays, us earth-minded folks are still called "hippies" and political pundits spit out "Environmentalists" like it's a dirty word, but I don't mind. I am privileged enough to have an entire circle of family and friends that conserve and protect in one way or another.

If you are a pregnant or new mama surfing over to my blog today, here are just a few things that we've picked up along the way to get you started on your green journey:
 

•  Reusables

  •  "A bottled water habit can cost a family $1200 a year, the paper towel habit $50, disposable batteries $30. Other habits than can add up: disposable dishes, Ziploc bags, baby wipes, and cleaning products. There are greener alternatives for all these things that will save you money while helping the health of people and the environment." (says Ask the Green Mama) I would add mama cloth and diapers (more about those below). Check facebook, etsy, and Hyena Cart for homemade reusable items that will save your family money over time, while saving the landfills the burden of throw-aways.
     

   

• Avoid the Plastic trap (pretty impossible, I know, but each purchase makes a difference). 

• "Many plastics have been found to leach BPA, phthalates, or other chemicals with health effects from feminizing effects on baby boys to toxicity concerns.  When avoiding plastics, prioritize the things that go into baby’s mouth or that contact food (e.g. chew toys, food containers, and bottles). There are great alternatives out there for all these things made from glass, stainless steel, and natural fibers like cotton and wool."( says Ask the Green Mama)

• Consider cloth diapering or even Elimination Communication. (Note: the amount of water used to wash the diapers is sometimes brought up, but trust me, I've been using these babies for over 2 and half years, with no noticeable rise in our water consumption, and the amount of petroleum to produce disposable diapers is staggering:

• In 1988, over 18 billion diapers were sold and consumed in the United States that year.⁴  Based on our calculations (listed below under "Cost: National Costs"), we estimate that 27.4 billion disposable diapers are consumed every year in the U.S.¹³
  The instructions on a disposable diaper package advice that all fecal matter should be deposited in the toilet before discarding, yet less than one half of one percent of all waste from single-use diapers goes into the sewage system.⁴
  Over 92% of all single-use diapers end up in a landfill.⁴
  In 1988, nearly $300 million dollars were spent annually just to discard disposable diapers, whereas cotton diapers are reused 50 to 200 times before being turned into rags.⁴
  No one knows how long it takes for a disposable diaper to decompose, but it is estimated to be about 250-500 years, long after your children, grandchildren and great, great, great grandchildren will be gone.⁵
  Disposable diapers are the third largest single consumer item in landfills, and represent about 4% of solid waste.  In a house with a child in diapers, disposables make up 50% of household waste.⁵
  Disposable diapers generate sixty times more solid waste and use twenty times more raw materials, like crude oil and wood pulp.³
  The manufacture and use of disposable diapers amounts to 2.3 times more water wasted than cloth.³
  Over 300 pounds of wood, 50 pounds of petroleum feedstocks and 20 pounds of chlorine are used to produce disposable diapers for one baby EACH YEAR.⁶
  In 1991, an attempt towards recycling disposable diapers was made in the city of Seattle, involving 800 families, 30 day care centers, a hospital and a Seattle-based recycler for a period of one year. The conclusion made by Procter & Gamble was that recycling disposable diapers was not an economically feasible task on any scale.¹⁷  
  ^{- from Real Diaper Association}
  
  
   

There are so many more things you can do, depending on your preferences - breastfeeding (that's as local and sustainable as it gets!), growing a garden (you can later incorporate your child! Learning and growing together!), making your own baby food, and much much more.


What are some "green" things you do in your family?

Today, Earth Day is celebrated by over 192 countries. WOW!

Growing Up Sensitive in a Tough World

Lately, I've been using the phrase: "Oh no, she's got the curse." My Sproutlet is a perfect blend of myself and her father, a funny, passionate, caring kid with a sunny disposition and empathy for miles. However, most recently we've been noticing "the curse"- being sensitive, too sensitive, or over-sensitive. Whether she was born with it (genetically passed down from me) or learned it (from me) it's here, and I'm afraid it's here to stay.

Let me begin by saying that I am a 27 year old (going on 28) that is extremely, highly, hyper-sensitive. Again, this could be in my genes, as my mother is sensitive as well, or likewise, could be learned behavior from observing her. Unfortunately I have never learned how to turn this trait off. It is with me at all times, and it has been a struggle to live in the same world as my independent, straight forward, often confident peers. In the Western Culture, we seem to value independence above all else- and the characteristics that will get us this, such as assertiveness, "leadership skills", a bold presence, etc, are praised and exalted. Oftentimes sensitive children are quiet introverts that do not possess these skills.

And so it is my fear that my daughter will have the same experiences that I had growing up. Of course, it is my job to prevent any unpleasantness that could come her way. In Finding Nemo, Marlin (the father) says something along the lines of "I don't want ANYTHING to happen to you!" and Dory comments, "Well, you can't never let anything happen to him." Which of course is true. But as an involved parent I've already begun to take the steps to easing her way through the world as gently as possible.

Firstly, it was in my nature already to practice attachment parenting. (Abbreviated as AP throughout the rest of this post). Again, this didn't occur in a vacuum- my mom practiced a version of AP and when it came time for me to have a child it was easy enough to pick it up as the "right way" of doing things. (Not starting a debate- I mean that I did things the way I was shown to do them, did what came naturally). As a very sensitive gal, I was able to pick up on cues my baby was communicating and when she was in distress, or even unhappy, I was unable to "turn off" my sensitive side, thus she was never left alone to cry (no matter how tired I got). Our physical closeness (breastfeeding, babywearing, co-sleeping...) led to an incredible bond that I consider the greatest accomplishment of my life thus far. But AP doesn't stop there, no- I continue to be (or try to be) in tune with my child's feelings (to the point where I can predict the outcome of any situation, often looking for red flags or triggers, more on this later). Being "attached", as we are, allows me to understand her feelings, or at least validate them- and work on a solution that I know will calm her down. After all, I understand what it's like to be oversensitive- which I basically describe as Having Big Feelings. I had them when I was her age and I have them now! 

So what are some things that made me think Sproutlet was "cursed with the S word"? 

On the website Positive Parents, there is an article about the Highly Sensitive BOY (emphasis mine). I imagine boys maybe do have a tougher time of it with society's demands being what they are for little men, but that's another story. Either way, they have a good list of indicators:

• Compassion
• Gentleness
• The ability to act as a peacemaker
• Concern about the humane treatment of animals
• A sense of responsibility
• Conscientiousness
• Creativity
• The tendency to feel love deeply
• A great intuitive ability
• An awareness of his unity with all beings
• The ability to have and appreciate deep spiritual experiences

On another website, Raising a Sensitive Child, they list these as characteristics of sensitive children:
What earmarks a child as ‘highly sensitive’? Highly sensitive children may exhibit one or all of the following traits. Schneider explains that the key is to notice a pattern of behavior, as well as the degree to which a child exhibits one or more of the following:

• Is your child highly sensitive to his/her senses? An excellent sense of smell or hearing? Very sensitive to pain?
•  Does your child get emotionally overwhelmed easily? Does she feel a wide, yet intense range of emotions? Does she sometimes get so excited she withdraws?
• Does your child have a depth greater than his peers, or even adults? Does he ask profound questions, think a lot on his own or reflect on his experiences?
• Is your child highly aware of her surroundings? Does she notice when small household items are moved or minor changes in others, like a haircut?
• Is your child very sensitive to other people’s emotions? Does he notice when someone is feeling sad and try to help him? Does he seem especially sensitive to the feelings of animals?

 So of course, many kids can display these things without being labeled "Sensitive". As they mention above, the degrees and frequency matter a lot in this case. I should also mention that the Sproutlet has SPD, a sensory disorder that possibly could explain some of these things, or at least co-exist within this list.

Really, the only thing that we, as parents, can do is change ourselves. There is nothing wrong with being sensitive (and it's very important to emphasis that WITH your child). And they won't change anyway (see: Me). I can tell you from experience that tough love, harsh words or yelling, even cursing, shaming or "constructive" criticism goes NO WHERE with me, so I can only imagine the effects it has on a young child. What I found extremely helpful was the introvert graphic below, which I apply to both myself and my child.

Especially helpful are number 2 number 8- when corrections need to be made, never ever do them in front of an audience. Pushing is also going to get you no where, at best you can nudge gently or passively guide in the right direction, but a direct push is going to get you a huge push back.

There are many books out there for reading more about raising sensitive children. If you think you might be the lucky parent of one of these special kiddos, I urge you to check out a couple books from your local library or Amazon, a few titles that caught my eye were:

Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking Paperback 

by Susan Cain

The Highly Sensitive Child: Helping Our Children Thrive When the World Overwhelms Them by Elaine Aron

The Highly Intuitive Child: A Guide to Understanding and Parenting Unusually Sensitive and Empathic Children by Catherine Crawford

Parenting the Highly Sensitive Child: A Guide for Parents & Caregivers of ADHD, Indigo and Highly Sensitive Children... by Julie B. Rosenshein

(Depending on who you ask, an "Indigo Child" is basically defined as:  sensitive, loving, in charge, intuitive, loners, feeling like an alien, etc. This comes from a New Age concept that not everyone reading will subscribe to. If I had to label myself, I would call myself an Indigo Child based on the characteristics listed here. I am unsure if my daughter could be labeled this, only time will tell. She certainly has a few of them but not all, like I seem to).

Lastly I'd like to note that a quick search around the internet and a brief look at these books will suggest homeschooling for your sensitive tot. This was already in the cards for us and has cemented my belief that it is the best thing for her- unless things dramatically change. Of course I realize this isn't possible for everyone. The best advice I can give is being as involved as possible in your child's day to day activities and lessons, therefore being able to provide back up support if needed and of course always notifying the child if things are about to change- this involves LONG, drawn out "warning" periods in which you talk about upcoming changes long before they become reality! 

A Harry Potter Analogy in the Land of Vaccine Choice and Discrimination

This blog post is over 32 days in the making. I realize it is long, and I apologize in advance for this. Thank you for bearing with me 'til the very end. If this is a topic you feel strongly about, please share this post!

If you are a delayed vaccination, select vaccination, or anti-vaccination parent, you will often hear an argument about "The Greater Good" - either from your doctor, your parents, or your peers.

The Greater Good argument goes something like this: you are threatening the lives of all around you by your selfish act of not vaccinating. The children and the elderly and immuno-compromised individuals who can not be vaccinated are counting on us to vaccinate ourselves for "The Greater Good"- all citizens will thrive, herd immunity... if you've taken part in any vaccine conversation, you certainly have heard it before.

Before debunking all those things (oh, yes, I'm going to completely debunk them), I'd like to talk about the implication you give every time you say that to me, or any other vaccine sensitive/vaccine injured child and/or their parents.

Since I openly admit that the question I get asked the most is "What's a vaccine injury?" I can not entirely blame you. Not at all. There is a HUGE glaring problem here... can you see it? Maybe not yet.

When you tell me that my choice for not vaccinating is not valid (in this case: vaccine sensitive and vaccine injured), and implying that I should vaccinate her anyway, you are telling me that my child does not matter. As long as the herd is healthy, you are willing to cull the herd until only the strongest are left. Survival of the fittest for the whole of humanity. My sickly child is not as strong and therefore is not fit to run in the herd. When you talk about The Greater Good, you are telling me that my child is disposable.

Why can I say that with such confidence? Because she will die. She will die from vaccines, as many of her peers have already and will still, as long as "The Greater Good" mentality is applied.

Strong words. Yes. But they need to be said. No one is talking about these kids. My kid.

Well, I will.

Since I started my research into vaccines in late 2011, I have come across hundreds if not thousands of vaccine injured kids. I unfortunately know of too many that have died.

Vaccine injury is the number one reason people become "anti-vaccination"- a term I despise. (See http://www.mercola.com/article/vaccines/statistics.htm) Because I am "pro-health", "pro-choice", "pro-safety" "pro-truth" I can't ethically agree with vaccines, and therefore I take the title of anti-vax, or even worse, "anti-science" (barf. I sincerely challenege anyone to come forward who claims to read more scientific, medicial, PEER REVIEWED studies and literature than I do. In my SPARE time. For it is my new priority. What was it again? Oh yeah, safety).

Unfortunately for these kids, and their well-meaning, usually highly educated parents ("Compared to undervaccinated children, unvaccinated children were more likely to be non-Hispanic white, have a mother who was older, married and who had a college degree. These children were more likely to live in a household with an annual income exceeding $75,000." - from http://www.immunizationinfo.org/science/demographics-unvaccinated-children )- they are met with prejudice at every turn.


 In Harry Potter and The Chamber of Secrets, we very quickly learn that some witches and wizards believe that all are not created equal. Draco Malfoy calls Hermione Granger a "mudblood" causing quite the reaction (including a backfired curse involving slugs). Not all magical folks feel this way, but the so called Purebloods believe that magic is a right only to be practiced by those of worthy parentage- (full blood wizards). Muggle-born wizards and witches do exist (and we know that they include among them the brightest witch of the age) but they meet some vicious prejudice and violence throughout the series. When applying this to everyday life, I see a lot of parallels.

From Harry Potter Wiki

We have of course the ruling class, the status quo- in Harry Potter, the Ministry's motto in the darkest of times is "Magic is Might". A young Dumbledore and his friend Grindlewald muse that they must insist oppression is for "The Greater Good" for everyone- detailed in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows.  (A line that Dumbledore only believed for a short time in his long life, but as we journey into the novel it is an important parallel story to the main plot.) "Mudbloods" are undesirable. One must give their "Blood Status" if they wish to go to school or keep their wands.

In this analogy we will use the term "Vaccination Status"-  meaning, an individual's vaccination level- full, partial, or vaccine-free. Your child's Vaccination Status will keep them out of certain schools. It is not feasible to believe that you can walk into any preschool of your choosing and not be asked to hand over medical records, and when full vaccination is not shown, it is unlikely you will enrolling your child into that school. Vaccination Status and Blood Status are literally the same here. Without full Vaccination Status, many individuals are barred from jobs (nurses, military folks, etc). The world is not open to a partially vaccinated or a vaccine-free person as it would be to a fully vaccinated person. The rights of these individuals are threatened on a regular basis. An extremely personal choice that is sometimes completely out of their hands (vaccine sensitive, vaccine injured, Muggle born) will forever be a deciding factor in many situations.

The most vocal "anti-choice" advocates would have all of the unvaccinated rounded up and declared- in fact, it's already happening- a simple google search will get you a green/yellow/red highlighted map of the "riskiest" schools.

The choice of whether or not to vaccinate is a human right that can not and should not be taken away. Some of the harshest vaccine critics call for a child to either be vaccinated by force or taken away from parents who refuse to vaccinate. When I conducted my own survey of parents on Survey Monkey, this is what they had to say about child ownership:

Please note that almost all replied that an overwhelming amount of respondents replied a child owns themselves, an interesting topic I don't often see in the debates. I myself have admitted that if my child wishes to vaccinate themselves when they are old enough to understand the concept and weigh the risks and benefits, then it is her body to do with what she choses. I wonder how many people out there feel similarly?

Also please note that ZERO percent of respondents answered "State" or "Country" as having any claim to their child.

When asked SPECIFICALLY who is allowed to make body alterations to their children, parents overwhelmingly responded that only they had the right to do so. 2 out of 15 respondents responded that only the child has the right to do so, one of those respondents being myself.

In conclusion, a huge majority of people think that only the legal guardians of a child have any right to alter a child in any way, from the most mundane things (hair cuts) to personal decisions (circumcisions and vaccines). I would love to see this done on a larger scale.

Please note that again, no one chose Community Effort- which was read as: "State, Country, Military, Medical Personnel, etc"

So what this post boils down to is a call to all of those using these words and phrases lightly to remember the people behind them. Here are a just a few people I would love to get you in touch with if you would like to criticize them to their face:

"A person may file a petition with respect to injuries, disabilities, illnesses, conditions, and deaths resulting from vaccines described in the Vaccine Injury Table… Set forth below is a list of petitions received by HRSA on * March 13, 2013, through April 30, 2013.*”
 

[ PLEASE take note of #7 and #17..]

1. Tory J. and Sarah E. Moody on behalf of Victorya E. Moody, Bedford, Indiana, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0190V.

2. Pamela Jean Peguess, Memphis, Tennessee, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0191V.

3. Eileen Goeschel, Sarasota, Florida, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0199V.

4. Kearsten Demczuk, Park Ridge, Illinois, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0205V. 5. Howard Reddy and Hanan Tarabay on behalf of Andrew Howard Reddy, Pensacola, Florida, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0208V.

6. Mona Marie Troup, Everett, Washington, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0209V.

7. Angel Blackstone on behalf of S.B., Deceased, Trenton, New Jersey, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0213V.

8. Isidra Durwin, Sarasota, Florida, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0214V.

9. Nancy and Sandro Giannetta on behalf of A.M.G., Sarasota, Florida, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0215V.

10. Kimberly Pedersen, West Allis, Wisconsin, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0216V.

11. Charles and Jeannie Maikish on behalf of S.M., Nyack, New York,Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0217V.

12. Ina Scanlon, Muncie, Indiana, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0219V.

13. David Stachlewitz on behalf of H.G.S., Glendale, Arizona, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0220V.

14. Mary E. Thompson, Brookport, Illinois, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0222V.

15. Matthew Gorski, Wynnewood, Pennsylvania, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0224V.

16. Woodrow Coffey, Jr., Irvine, California, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0225V. 

17. Stephen Warren on behalf of Taylor Warren, Deceased, New York, New York, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0226V.

18. Robert Wiggins, Nashville, North Carolina, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0228V.

19. Peggy Kalmeyer, Depew, New York, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0230V.

20. Rosemary and Wayne Trezza on behalf of P.T., West Orange, New Jersey, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0231V.

21. Jane Tomassetti, Woodbury, Minnesota, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0234V.

22. Everett Johnson, Sr., Ashland, Kentucky, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0235V.

23. Edwin W. Fockler, Sarasota, Florida, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0237V. 24. James Cox, Las Cruces, New Mexico, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0238V. 25. Chanel and Paul A. Monroe on behalf of Angelina Monroe, Las Vegas, Nevada, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0239V.

26. Noteel Koss, Houston, Texas, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0240V.

27. Tamika M. Kratzer on behalf of Ian M. Kratzer, Sacramento, California, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0243V.

28. Rosalie Peck, Boston, Massachusetts, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0249V. 29. Shannon Keller, Sacramento, California, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0250V.

30. Edwina Bradshaw, North Myrtle Beach, North Carolina, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0252V.

31. William and Brenda Lehann Rodriguez on behalf of C.R., Clayton, Georgia, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0253V.

32. Corrine K. Ibana, Kamuela, Hawaii, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0257V. 33. Lorel Cubano, San Juan, Puerto Rico, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0259V. 34. Brittany and Davey Lambert on behalf of Noah Lambert, Memphis, Tennessee, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0265V.

35. Scott and Caroline VanScoy on behalf of Alyssa VanScoy, Simi Valley, California, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0266V.

36. Jane Sprecher, Reading, Pennsylvania, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0271V.

37. Georgia Murdock, Silver Spring, Maryland, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0273V.

38. Willie Andre Simmons, Augusta, Georgia, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0274V.

39. Jung Park, M.D., New York, New York, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0275V. 40. Allison and Steven Council on behalf of Adam Council, Plainfield, Illinois, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0276V.

41. Maryann Giordano, Lindenhurst, New York, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0277V.

42. Laura A. Jones, Greensboro, North Carolina, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0279V.

43. David D. Griffin, Afghanistan, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0280V.

44. James Demoski, Endicott, New York, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0286V. 45. Christina N. Steinat, Seattle, Washington, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0287V.

46. Jessica L. Stone, Baraboo, Wisconsin, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0289V. 47. Holly Rhew, Wichita, Kansas, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0293V.

48. Janet DeYear, Dallas, Texas, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0299V.

49. Cynthia Adkins, Sarasota, Florida, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0295V.

50. Saurabh V. and Archana Amin on behalf of Sheaa Amin, Linwood, New Jersey, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0300V.

51. Juliet and Mohamed Edoo on behalf of Justin Edoo, Miami, Florida, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0302V.

52. James Boyer, Boston, Massachusetts, Court of Federal Claims No: 13-0303V.

*these are from March 13, 2013 – April 30, 2013. 48 days. what is the true number that these 52 petitions represent? how many don’t file claims? think about it..its scary"(from http://therefurbishedrogue.wordpress.com/2013/05/03/my-list-of-peer-reviewed-vaccine-research/)

For further reading I implore you to visit Peer Review Vaccine Studies - a long list of medical research disproving the safety of routine childhood vaccination. This is where you will find a large amount of debunking of popular opinion on vaccine safety, success, and history.

For research supporting Vaccine/Autism causation, please visit 84 Scientific Studies at Adventures in Autism' "No Evidence of Any Link (2.0)"

Perhaps the best article on the internet for vaccine researchers comes from Blinded by the Light. Titled "A Specific Approach to the Question: 'Why Don't You Vaccinate?'" this amazing post highlights the Disease, Transmission, Risk/Prevalence, Protection from the Vaccine (most vaccines wear off in 3-8 years, some providing shorter, some providing longer), and Treatment of the Disease--- for every disease we currently vaccinate for in the US.

Lastly I would like to note that studies are FINALLY being conducted on the health of unvaccinated vs vaccinated children. For a very, very long time one of the best arguments was that there were no studies done on this, ever. I have one from New Zealand here: Studies Prove Without Doubt That Unvaccinated Children Are Far Healthier Than Their Vaccinated Peers but this only calls for much larger, broad-scale studies to be done all over the world, as I'm afraid the title is not entirely accurate. Anecdotally, I completely agree. My partially vaccinated child is much healthier than myself and than practically every single one of her large peer group. But as we all know, anecdotes will be tossed out in a second in this scientifically fueled debate. 

Debunking Herd Immunity (The "Greater Good" Theory): 

• http://www.thehealthyhomeeconomist.com/the-herd-immunity-myth-and-how-it-pits-parent-against-parent/
• http://journal.livingfood.us/2012/02/24/vaccines-the-fallacy-and-truth-about-herd-immunity/
• http://www.vaccineriskawareness.com/The-Herd-Immunity-Theory-Treating-Our-Children-Like-Cattle
•  http://gianelloni.wordpress.com/2013/09/13/the-myth-of-herd-immunity/

NOTE: Due to the recently circulating Measles scare in my area, I feel it is once again prudent to share information regarding why being scared of the measles is ridiculous.

http://gianelloni.wordpress.com/2013/08/27/measles-shmeasles/ An amazing article by the Gianelloni Family, whom I suggest you follow if this is an area of interest for you!!

http://www.drjjgregor.com/2013/08/27/affraid-big-bad-measles/#sthash.V6Y6Llkj.dpbs

and lastly a book recommendation from the Doctor who freed me from fear: How to Raise a Healthy Child in Spite of your Doctor

...And if you are still here (thank you!) I would just beg you to read just a couple of the heartbreaking vaccine injury stories that are available to you through the power of the internet. These people are not lying, are not sensationalists, they are just parents who vaccinated their baby or small child at the advice of medical personnel they trusted only to have their world come crashing down on them. To get started, please see my Remembering the Fallen facebook page or my Pinterest page here: http://www.pinterest.com/audrey9786/remembering-the-fallen-vaccine-injury-and-death-aw/

 And finally I leave you with this image, in hopes that you will consider everything I've said today with an open heart and an open mind. These children do not want to be discriminated against. They are healthy, healing, happy children who were born to educated/informed parents. They have just as much as a right to live and breathe as all others. Please discontinue the tirade of hate these children receive on a daily basis. 

For more brilliant articles and posts by people all over the world EVERY DAY, please follow my facebook page Remembering The Fallen- Vaccine Injury and Death Awareness!

A quick thank you to J.K. Rowling for writing one of the most powerful class/caste/social systems series of our time, and for kindly allowing me to make reference to it in an allegorical manner. All Harry Potter trademarks are copyright J.K. Rowling / Warner Bros. I do not own any of the names, places, ideas, or pictures used in this blog article.

Oh.....Ow.

So according to my last post, we were getting much better and the Sproutlet had returned to full health.

Friday I was even feeling better and wanted to get back to the daily grind.

Saturday morning I woke up and my right ear was clogged, like I had water in it and couldn't shake it out. Within the hour, I was crying like a baby. Ear infection, for sure! I had to cash in an This is an Emergency card and headed out to the clinic. Despite my all natural leanings, I was in excruciating pain and knew there was nothing that could be done at home.

Come to find out, they don't really give antibiotics for ear infections anymore. This is great news, I'm so glad they aren't overprescribing things, but I would not have stepped foot in a medical facility, especially for the second time in 2 months, if I wasn't in SEVERE need of attention. I rated my pain a 9 out of 10. After a little debate I was prescribed ear drops for the pain and amoxicillin, which was supposed to be a "wait and see" prescription- fill it a couple days after being seen- ha, filled that puppy right away.

The point I'm trying to make here is that even I know the limits, and when it's appropriate to seek professional help. That was the fastest onset of anything I've ever had, absolutely no warning whatsoever. Driving to the clinic, I was really beating myself up. I felt like a failure and a fraud, not to mention so much weaker than my daughter. But now that yesterday is behind me I realize there was just nothing else I could have possibly done. I'm still couch surfing today, taking it one day at a time... hoping tomorrow is a better day. The Sproutlet has TOO MUCH energy if you ask me, she's been bouncing off the walls and just desperate for me to get better.

Here's to a wise balance of home remedies and modern medicine.

When the Flu Comes to Call

These past two weeks have been interesting. I was writing pretty regularly while the Sproutlet was sick, she seemed to have a pretty bad cold, that included a fever and a cough and some waking up during the night. She was probably the sickest she's ever been (she's rarely sick), but with the fever barely spiking and her having tons of energy (despite my pleas to just rest!) she sailed through it just fine.

Sproutlet got nightly baths of salts for detoxing and EOs for healing and soothing symptoms and was better in 4-5 days. Her fever never went above 101 under the arm. We did use a fever reducer twice when the fever was 101.

Well, about a week passed, and I finally succumbed to it. Except, it was a lot different for me! All of the sudden I was feverish, had chills, couldn't stay warm, my body ached, I couldn't move much.... yup, even though I dragged my feet about it and didn't admit it until 4 days in, it was the flu.

The flu? That I definitely got from my 2 year old? Who just seemed "fine"? If I hadn't gotten it, I would never in a million years have thought the Sproutlet had the flu. But look at that, she did and I didn't even know it! Her immune system is nothing short of amazing. We are very very dissimilar in that regard!

So I'm over here still not feeling so great, with a weekend's worth of plans canceled, but that's okay. It was a great experiment in handling the virus our way. We successfully used homeopathic remedies to lessen symptoms, and even I was in the salt bath a couple times and found it to be extremely helpful. Because my nutrition is not nearly as stellar as Sproutlet's, yesterday and today I took a few supplements that I had in the house to help me fight off the virus.

The first thing that I always reach for (every day, in fact) is my Arbonne Immunity Boost. It's got Elderberry and Echinecea.

Even while I was sick, I still took this pill. Both ingredients can help heal in addition to warding off germs.

These are the other things I started taking yesterday:

Since I was walking around in a stupor the first few days (and not literally walking, mostly laying around) I totally forgot to take these and think I prolonged the illness accidentally by not getting on a regimen right away.

For your reference, here are some links about the properties of each of the above things:

• Elderberry
• 
  
• Echinacea
• 
  
• Garlic
• 
  
• Cinnamon
•  
• Ginger Root
•  
• Tumeric cucumin
• 
  
• Fish Oil (Omega-3s)

It should be noted that I have taken these previously and had no side effects, which allowed me to make a sure decision in taking all of these at once. Whenever you try something new, remember to try it in isolation so you can correctly determine an adverse reaction and its cause.

Sproutlet DID take supplements in the form of elderberry syrup, vitamin D and probiotics, as I outlined in "Natural Remedies" and "Natural Remedies, Part 2".

And honestly, the thing that I was stressing to Sproutlet? PLEASE REST! Resting, sleeping, napping.... these are the things that have seriously made an impact in my return to health. Despite having a toddler, I am super lucky to have a mom and a husband who really stepped up to the plate to take care of BOTH of us, since we were sick separately and not at the same time. Thanks guys!!

So when the flu does come to call, don't be too scared. There is a lot to be said about staying home and not spreading the germs around. I very highly suspect we picked up the virus at the pediatrician's office. Whether this was from vaccine shedding (The flu mist is a live virus) or just picking it up from another flu patient, I will never know, and it matters not- what does matter is to stay home, even if you are sick for an entire week (or more). And please hydrate hydrate hydrate, and rest rest rest!

We should be back to normal routine in no time.

Being Different

This post has been kicking around in my head for a long time, and I finally feel ready to write it.

I'm not trying to make myself sound like a martyr, I truly am different from what could be labeled "popular" or "mainstream". I think differently, do things differently, and worse yet, I talk about it a lot. I champion away, seeing myself as a mighty warrior doing the work of many that either can't or don't want to. But let's be very clear, that is my choice. I made a decision awhile ago, after wondering for a long time if I wanted to be popular or if I wanted to be a loudmouth about the things I believe in. I have no ill feelings towards people who think just like me but choose to be quiet about it. I seriously contemplated that life.   Some days, that nice quiet life seems like a great idea! But I have chosen my path and have so much to share with the world, I feel like I would be doing myself a disservice if I wasn't exactly who I am. I am unquestioningly, unwavering, un-apologetically me.

However, do not believe me to be a pariah. My daughter and I are very lucky to have lots of friends both near and far. There is a common misconception about advocates, in my opinion. People seem to think they can be harsh, abrasive, nosy people who can't help but talk about their causes all day long. I think most moms would agree with me, when you meet a new parent on the playground, your first impulse isn't to ask where their child sleeps at night or something equally as intrusive. Whatever your "cause" is, new people you just met aren't going to know about it.

Social media changes the dynamic for this a bit, of course. I am a very open person and don't hide who I am on the internet, and of course, most people feel braver, less reserved in front of a keyboard. A conversation that might not happen on a playground might happen in a closed group on Facebook. I have a particularly close group of friends that know an awful lot about me and my family. I have volunteered the information freely- for example, they know my daughter's "Vaccination Status." I have chosen to share it with them. In some circles, this is a huge risk. Some people who differ from the normal schedule choose not to share this information, and go through life never ever speaking about it. That is to say, it's not just the kid next to yours at library time or in the cart ahead of you at the supermarket that's unvaccinated, it very well could be your close friends. But for me, that didn't work. I needed to be me, and that person is very very outspoken about my beliefs and truths. And perhaps I am the luckiest person on the planet but I don't know anyone who has purposefully stopped hanging out with us because of it.

That is not to say there hasn't been Unfriending. Oh, the unfriending. IRL (in real life) it's harder to make such a statement, but as soon as we get online, people have the power to say "I disagree with you so hard that I just need to break this connection with you". And yes, it hurts a little but mostly it's disappointing that people feel this way, as I consider myself a very tolerant person and really can't imagine severing ties with someone over beliefs that aren't mutual, as that in itself doesn't hurt my feelings. I am also a fan of scrolling. If someone posts something that I don't like, I scroll by it (yes, sometimes with great effort).

An advocate sometimes has a very hard time doing this. I myself needed a very large learning curve.

Here is a visual representation of how a lot of my internet time was spent:

What I ended up having to do was surround myself with like-minded people. I joined groups of parents that were fighting the same battles I was. I searched instagram for moms just like me and sent requests to follow them. Some people eschew the thought of labels-- "I am more than just a label!!" but I revel in them-- if you profile says BF BW CS BLW ERF AV, you're getting an instant follow request. It's like knowing someone's core values without having to spend months in the beginning being all pussyfooted. Love it. (By the way, if you are looking for a BF BW CD CS BLW ERF AV EOs mom on instagram, I'm mygreatestaccomplishment). Now my social media sites are filled with like-minded people who not only post things I'm interested in, but have advice for me and experiences to share. I imagine the world was a lonely place without the internet, and give props to it often. But I have to strongly dissuade you from thinking it's like a cult, I'm getting the best of both worlds this way. All of my real friends' statuses and pictures are peppered into my feed as well. Having a few hippies like me in the fray makes me feel like less of an oddball, and reinforces the fact that I know what I'm doing, I'm not the only one, it's just not me on this lonely planet.

As for my personal Facebook feed: I was posting to it a lot. I created a separate page, Remembering the Fallen: Vaccine Injury and Death Awareness and invited all of my Facebook friends to follow it if they so wished. That way, when I *HAD* to share something, I had an outlet, and people I knew could choose if they wanted to see it (or not. Mostly not.) Again, through the magic of the internet, I have found tons of ears (eyes?) to talk to. I feel like I'm doing something worthwhile and meaningful on a daily basis, something that I was missing before.

Very quickly I want to comment on perpetuating the Mommy Wars. Recently I have come to understand both sides. Some say the Mommy Wars absolutely have to stop, it's tearing us apart and ruining the best job in the universe. Others say they must continue, because the battles are over KEY issues that can not be ignored, and getting the "right" thing to do out to a wider audience is much more important thing than someone's feelings. Honestly, yeah, I do believe a lot of practices are outdated and that everyone could use a little more love and compassion in their lives. My views are again very different than what you'll get in the general population. (Sorry for the vagueness, I'm sure you can insert any parenting topic and fill in your own blanks).  But, again this is a recent development, now I comment with kindness instead of going on the offensive (which, let's face it, no one wants to hear, it won't be well received and you are just going to cause a rift between someone you care about (or know IRL, or respect. or whatever the circumstances may be).
Just last night I commented on a facebook status: "There are so many things I want to tell you, but I can see that this isn't the time or the place and that it won't be well received. As a mommy of a vaccine injured child this article hearts my heart, but I can see that you are also passionate about your children, and in that, we are exactly alike. But if you ever do have any questions, I would be honored to try to answer them. Xoxo" and the person responded in kind, yes, we are very passionate about our children. 

The reason why people like she and I, just like so many others around the globe, will never, EVER see eye to eye is because we are this:

DO. NOT. MESS. WITH. OUR. CUBS. Don't even think about it. Am I right? This is the one thing we are so passionate about that we are literally fighting battles about the best way to raise them. And who can honestly blame us? These are our CHILDREN we are talking about. They ARE the future. They are our single greatest contribution to the world and the perpetuation of the entire SPECIES. In layman's terms, they are pretty damn important! Of COURSE we want to get it right. You don't get a do-over. You get ONE life, one chance, one shot. You are going to feel pretty strongly about any decision you make regarding your children. Why? Because it has a permanency that can't be erased. "I've ruined my child" someone will say when they do something as trivial as allowing them to stay up an extra hour at night. So you have to magnify that feeling about 10 MILLION times. To say you are going to be protective about your decisions is laughable. You'll be more than "protective"! It will become your core being! And when your core being is challenged, just watch how quickly you become an agitated mama bear (or lioness)!

Baby Led Weaning: The In's and Out's (Mostly Out's)

One of the things I've touched briefly upon is Baby Led Weaning, and in this post I'm going to explain the process a little more.

In our experience, our breastfeeding journey continued throughout this time. It's important to note that the AAP recommends breastfeeding exclusively through 6 months of age, and the WHO guidelines suggest breastfeeding through 2 years of age. Many parents like to use the phrase "food before one is just for fun" and it's a great mindset to have.

In our case, I had a hungry little monkey on our hands! We started foods at 4 months, as the 6 month guideline had not yet reached the mainstream and I hadn't heard of it yet. In the very beginning, we reached for Plum Organics, Sprout, and Happy Baby organic baby foods, in a variety of vegetables and fruits.

We did avoid rice cereal. When giving a grain, it was always oats from Sprout. If you haven't yet read the warnings on rice cereal for babies, please check out:

• Arsenic Found in Rice at High Levels (WebMD)
• 
  
• Rice Cereal Controversy (ABC News)
• 
  
• Nine Good Reasons NOT to Use Baby Rice (Analytical Armadillo UK)
•  

For us, Baby Led Weaning (BLW) was just as much as a learning experience as it was a meal. It was amazing to watch our Sproutlet make connections, practice hand-eye coordination, cause and effect, and just have a good sensory experience (we didn't know until later how helpful and therapeutic sensory activities could be for her!)

BLW is the practice of allowing a young child to self feed.

"The distinct advantage of weaning at around six months is that by then, our children are developmentally capable of feeding themselves proper food, in other words – no more mush!
You just hand them the food in a suitably-sized piece and if they like it they eat it and if they don’t they won’t.... This is meant in the Brit sense, not the American. In the UK, ‘weaning’ means ‘adding complementary foods’, whereas in the States it means ‘giving up breastfeeding’." - http://www.babyledweaning.com/

The reason why I titled this post "mostly out's" is because a lot of the food won't go in at first!! Expect a bit of a mess! Which is okay, remember: babies are still getting all the nutrients they need from breast milk! It's a fun time of exploration and new experiences for baby.

Yummy Avocado! 5 months old

When I asked for contributions to this blog, a surprising number of parents posted their experiences. Babyled weaning is certainly gaining in popularity! The average start date for most families was 6 months, with some waiting until 8-9 months. Some babies preferred breast milk to food until 13 months +. My contributors reported trying avocado, sweet potato, carrots, crackers and bananas, as well as meats around 7 months! (A huge thank you to everyone who responded- it was extremely helpful!) I think this shows that you can definitely have some freedom when trying BLW... there aren't any rules, besides being a great supervisor while your little one is eating :) And a lot of parents contribute their child's great eating to early BLW!

The site I used as my guide during this time was http://wholesomebabyfood.momtastic.com/babyledweaning.htm#.UuvNj7S7S8A, especially their Solid Food Charts, starting with 4-6 months:

 

There is also a chart to note if you child seemed to enjoy the food and whether or not they had a reaction to it. 

One of the great things about BLW is you can cook food for the whole family- offer baby the same foods you are eating on your dinner plate at an early age. No need to cook two meals or puree your own baby food! A great time saver. 

One of my favorite memories is when our Sproutlet was 7 months old, I took her to Disney World. Whenever we had a sit down meal, we would order her food off the kid's menu. Some of the waiters were shocked! But she would munch on grilled chicken, mashed potatoes, carrots, green beans, fruit cups, biscuits, and much more! We were very lucky and didn't notice a reaction to anything, and she was quite the foodie from an early age, something I absolutely contribute to BLW!

Puffs at Wolfgang Puck's at Downtown Disney! Her meal here was amazing- chicken, mashed potatoes, broccoli!

Hold up, Cinderella, This cantalope requires my full attention!

Attachment Parenting vs Natural Parenting: Which are you??

I tend to blend the terms "natural parenting" and "attachment parenting" into the same thing sometimes. You may have noticed this already on this blog. The two are definitely different, yet I'm not the only one who blends them together.

It's possible that you've pegged me as a Dr. Sears follower. It's true, I like the guy, and his books were my first sampling of the lifestyle I'm enjoying now.

I am going to copy and paste the entire page "What AP is: 7 Baby B's" from the Ask Dr. Sears website. You can view the page here. I'm wondering if you can see the reasons why AP and NP are so often regarded as similar to the point of being the same thing.

7 ATTACHMENT TOOLS: THE BABY B’S

1. Birth bonding

The way baby and parents get started with one another helps the early attachment unfold. The days and weeks after birth are a sensitive period in which mothers and babies are uniquely primed to want to be close to one another. A close attachment after birth and beyond allows the natural, biological attachment-promoting behaviors of the infant and the intuitive, biological, caregiving qualities of the mother to come together. Both members of this biological pair get off to the right start at a time when the infant is most needy and the mother is most ready to nurture (see Bonding)
“What if something happens to prevent our immediate bonding?”
Sometimes medical complications keep you and your baby apart for a while, but then catch-up bonding is what happens, starting as soon as possible. When the concept of bonding was first delivered onto the parenting scene twenty years ago, some people got it out of balance. The concept of human bonding being an absolute “critical period” or a “now-or-never” relationship was never intended. Birth bonding is not like instant glue that cements the mother-child relationship together forever. Bonding is a series of steps in your lifelong growing together with your child. Immediate bonding simply gives the parent- infant relationship a headstart. (See “Birth Bonding”)

2. Breastfeeding

Breastfeeding is an exercise in babyreading. Breastfeeding helps you read your baby’s cues, her body language, which is the first step in getting to know your baby. Breastfeeding gives baby and mother a smart start in life. Breastmilk contains unique brain-building nutrients that cannot be manufactured or bought. Breastfeeding promotes the right chemistry between mother and baby by stimulating your body to produce prolactin and oxytocin, hormones that give your mothering a boost.

3. Babywearing

A baby learns a lot in the arms of a busy caregiver. Carried babies fuss less and spend more time in the state of quiet alertness, the behavior state in which babies learn most about their environment. Babywearing improves the sensitivity of the parents. Because your baby is so close to you, you get to know baby better. Closeness promotes familiarity. (Click here for more information on Babywearing, and for babywearing products check out Balboa Baby.)

4. Bedding close to baby

Wherever all family members get the best night’s sleep is the right arrangement for your individual family. Co-sleeping co-sleeping adds a nighttime touch that helps busy daytime parents reconnect with their infant at night. Since nighttime is scary time for little people, sleeping within close touching and nursing distance minimizes nighttime separation anxiety and helps baby learn that sleep is a pleasant state to enter and a fearless state to remain in.

5. Belief in the language value of your baby’s cry

A baby’s cry is a signal designed for the survival of the baby and the development of the parents. Responding sensitively to your baby’s cries builds trust. Babies trust that their caregivers will be responsive to their needs. Parents gradually learn to trust in their ability to appropriately meet their baby’s needs. This raises the parent-child communication level up a notch. Tiny babies cry to communicate, not to manipulate. (See Crying and Cry it Out)

6. Beware of baby trainers

Attachment parenting teaches you how to be discerning of advice, especially those rigid and extreme parenting styles that teach you to watch a clock or a schedule instead of your baby; you know, the cry-it-out crowd. This “convenience” parenting is a short-term gain, but a long-term loss, and is not a wise investment. These more restrained styles of parenting create a distance between you and your baby and keep you from becoming an expert in your child.

7. Balance

In your zeal to give so much to your baby, it’s easy to neglect the needs of yourself and your marriage. As you will learn the key to putting balance in your parenting is being appropriately responsive to your baby – knowing when to say “yes” and when to say “no,” and having the wisdom to say “yes” to yourself when you need help.

MORE ABOUT ATTACHMENT PARENTING

• AP is a starter style. There may be medical or family circumstances why you are unable to practice all of these baby B’s. Attachment parenting implies first opening your mind and heart to the individual needs of your baby, and eventually you will develop the wisdom on how to make on-the-spot decisions on what works best for both you and your baby. Do the best you can with the resources you have – that’s all your child will ever expect of you. These baby B’s help parents and baby get off to the right start. Use these as starter tips to work out your own parenting style – one that fits the individual needs of your child and your family. Attachment parenting helps you develop your own personal parenting style.
• AP is an approach, rather than a strict set of rules. It’s actually the style that many parents use instinctively. Parenting is too individual and baby too complex for there to be only one way. The important point is to get connected to your baby, and the baby B’s of attachment parenting help. Once connected, stick with what is working and modify what is not. You will ultimately develop your own parenting style that helps parent and baby find a way to fit – the little word that so economically describes the relationship between parent and baby.
• AP is responsive parenting. By becoming sensitive to the cues of your infant, you learn to read your baby’s level of need. Because baby trusts that his needs will be met and his language listened to, the infant trusts in his ability to give cues. As a result, baby becomes a better cue-giver, parents become better cue-readers, and the whole parent-child communication network becomes easier.
• AP is a tool. Tools are things you use to complete a job. The better the tools, the easier and the better you can do the job. Notice we use the term “tools” rather than “steps.” With tools you can pick and choose which of those fit your personal parent-child relationship. Steps imply that you have to use all the steps to get the job done. Think of attachment parenting as connecting tools, interactions with your infant that help you and your child get connected. Once connected, the whole parent-child relationship (discipline, healthcare, and plain old having fun with your child) becomes more natural and enjoyable. Consider AP a discipline tool. The better you know your child, the more your child trusts you, and the more effective your discipline will be. You will find it easier to discipline your child and your child will be easier to discipline.

I think that does a superb job of explaining the minds of many attachment parents. And now, let's find a definition for Natural Parenting.  The Natural Parents Network has a great page defining the ways of the natural parent, which you can view in it's entirety here. Again, I am going to copy and paste it in full for our comparison.

“Natural parenting” is based on a desire to live and parent responsively and consciously. While no two families who practice natural parenting may define it the same way, there are several principles that are widely agreed to be part of this lifestyle. These are ideals that natural parents tend to hold — even if we don’t always live up to all of them, we keep them in mind as goals.
Please click on each topic to find links to and descriptions of resources for each natural parenting category.
Attachment/Responsive Parenting: Attachment/responsive parenting¹ is generally considered to include the following (descriptions/lists are not exhaustive, please follow each link to learn more):

1. Prepare for pregnancy, birth, and parenting: parents and parents-to-be research parenting philosophies; maintain a healthy diet and active lifestyle; educate themselves about healthcare providers, birthing options, and the risks and benefits of medical interventions; research breastfeeding and routine newborn care procedures (circumcision, etc.);
2. Feed with love and respect: practice exclusive and full-term breastfeeding if possible, and feed with love and respect regardless of whether it is at the breast or with a bottle; parents continue to nurture when introducing solids, and strive to offer healthy, wholesome foods when babies are ready;
3. Respond with sensitivity: parents understand that babies cry to communicate needs, and that physical contact is healthy and natural. Parents continue to respond with sensitivity into toddlerhood and beyond, embracing big emotions and helping children learn to communicate gently (rather than stifling emotions or punishing “tantrums”);
4. Use nurturing touch: this category includes babywearing and skin-to-skin contact for infants, and hugs and physical play for older children;
5. Ensure safe sleep: parents take steps to make sleep safe both physically and emotionally; this category includes bed sharing and co-sleeping, responsive nighttime parenting, and no “crying it out”;
6. Provide consistent and loving care: Parents do not attempt to put babies on strict feeding or sleep schedules. When parents must leave children with alternative caregivers, they find caregivers who respect the children’s needs and are supportive of the attachment principles;
7. Practice gentle/positive discipline: Parents do not discipline to control, manipulate, or put fear into their children, but to teach. Parents strive for communication and mutual respect and avoid harsh/physical punishment;
8. Strive for balance in personal and family life: Families seek to balance the needs and wants of each family member.

Ecological Responsibility and Love of Nature: Families strive to reduce their ecological footprint by living consciously and making Earth-friendly choices, such as by choosing organic when possible, using cloth diapers or practicing elimination communication, supporting local economies, and so forth. Parents may choose to find toys and clothing made of natural fibers and materials. Families spend quality time outside enjoying the natural world.
Holistic Health Practices: Parents research medical choices and make educated decisions regarding all health care (circumcision, vaccinations, medical interventions, medications, etc.). Many families choose to use alternative or natural healthcare such as herbal remedies, chiropractic care, natural childbirth, and so on.
Natural Learning: Families spend time together, and children learn through everyday activities. Parents try to facilitate learning without “teaching,” to help children ask questions that develop thinking, to develop consideration for others without shaming or training, to give choices while guiding the children, to listen to instinctual cues, to honor emotions and desires, to allow development to take place in its own time, and to engender cooperation and harmony without manipulation. This might include the decision to pursue uncommon methods of education, such as alternative classrooms, home schooling, or unschooling.

 Above all, natural parenting is making the choice to develop a deep bond with your children and family based on mutual respect. An attached child grows into a mature and interdependent individual who understands how to develop healthy, secure relationships with others.

In my opinion, they compliment each other, and in my experience, Attachment Parenting led to Natural Parenting.

What do you think? Can you be one without the other? Do you think they are unfairly combined, or does an AP parent always equal a NP?